Blog si Feminis

Gender-based power relation means that women experience poverty differently and more forcefully than men do and women are more vulnerable to chronic poverty because of gender inequality in the distribution of income, access to productive inputs, such as credit, command over property or control over earned income, as well as gender biased in labor markets. (Nilufer Cagatay, Trade, Gender and Poverty, London: UNDP, 2001)

Read my complete article in the following site:

http://afeministblog.blogspot.com/2007/05/poverty-has-women-face.html

Thanks a bunch,
Nana

When someone comes from a poor family, he/she only knows poor people too, with limited education and horizon, how could they improve their own social status?

Read the complete article of mine in the following site:

http://afeministblog.blogspot.com/2007/05/some-portraits-of-poverty-in-indonesia.html

Merci bien,
Nana

Some months ago a workmate of mine told me about her being upset to her in-laws that, in her opinion, are lazy to work, to struggle to alleviate their own poverty.

Read the continuation of the above paragraph in the following site:

http://afeministblog.blogspot.com/2007/05/poverty-whose-mistakes.html

Thanks,
Nana

A week ago, when I was somewhat unhappy (thinking of Angie’s growing up, making herself busy without involving me, while so far we have been oftentimes together), I wrote something for my blog. One of my blog friends at blog.co.uk then encouraged me to read her poem in her blog, she wrote the poem when she was unhappy due to her divorce, and her daughters cheered her up.

Lovely poem, indeed. You can view it in the original site at http://mypoetry.blog.co.uk/2007/03/07/daughters~1860739

Daughters

Where have both my babies gone?
Those cupid lips of deepest pink
Which smile and brightest eyes
That seldom blink
Those chubby hands with dimples ten
And arms outstretched to mum again

Where have both my little girls gone
With frills and ribbons in their hair
With stockings white
Without a care
Those laughing children as they play
Where have they gone – and where today?

I look around and now I find
Two loving sisters fully grown
They share my joys, my hopes, my fears
They turn my house into a home

I did not see the years fly by
And looking back I can but try
To understand when babies turned
To little girls, then women learned
But this I know I glow with pride
To see them standing side by side
And feel the love that we all share
And know that they are always there

©Marian Barker

Yesterday I gave the Periodic Test 1 to my Advanced 4 class. FYI, this is the highest level for General Program in the English Course where I work. The test comprises 10 questions for LISTENING, 10 questions for USAGE., 15 questions for VOCABULARY and READING COMPREHENSION. The last part was to write an essay, so it must be complete, consists of an introductory paragraph, the body, and then the concluding paragraph. There were two topics to choose:

v     Recycled paper is more worth using rather than virgin paper. The students are to write a 100-word argumentative article,

v     Falling in love at the first sight: a miracle or a fairy tale? The students are to write a 150-word article, free of any kind of writing. They can choose a narrative, expository, descriptive, or argumentative writing.

After collecting the answer sheets, I found out that all boys chose the first topic, while all girls chose the second one. This is very interesting to me.

I personally would choose the second topic because I am included into romantic type. This is my own “reading” about myself. LOL. Did those girls share the same opinion with me? Or perhaps for girls, LOVE is always a very interesting topic to discuss? Boys think that LOVE is boring or are they included into hostile creature rather than loving? LOL.

When giving the two topics, I heard some students grumbled about the 150-word for the second topic. So, it is possible that perhaps the male students chose the more practical one—only writing 100-word article. LOL.

At that time, I remember what my Abang said to me, “No matter what, Nana, men and women are different. How can you struggle to realize the similarities between them?” (I forgot whether he was just kidding me at that time, or whether he was serious.)

I remember one email I got some months ago from one blog visitor. He somewhat laughed at my idea when reading my profile where I wrote, “I believe men and women are equal in all facets in this life.” “Can you beat me for bench-press?”

Of course men and women are different, not only in their physical bodies, but also in their way of thinking, their way of perceiving something, their experience in this patriarchal world that automatically will make them their own way to solve problems, etc.

What I meant by saying, or writing, LOL, “I believe men and women are equal in all facts in this life” is that they have full rights to choose anything they want to do in their life without having to be limited with their physical bodies. Stereotyping of men and women that have happened for million centuries have limited both of them to do what they want to do with reason, “You are man. You are not supposed to do this.” Or similar thing, “You are woman. You are not supposed to do this.” And we all know mostly the limitation for not doing this and that is more for women.

Going back to my class, my students were free to choose between the two topics offered, no matter what sex they have. J I was just curious why it happened that all girls chose the second topic while all boys chose the first one. And my curiosity made me produce this writing to post in my blogs. LOL. LOL.

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Proctoring a test is apparently one most-liked activity in class for my workmates. I love it too because while proctoring, I can scribble something in the cutie, or on a piece of paper, before my darling Abang gave me the cutie. Perhaps people then will think that I am not a good proctor? LOL. I am quite a strict proctor at the beginning minutes I enter a classroom. I will carefully pay attention to whether the students creatively have changed the arrangement of the chairs so that they can cheat one another easily. LOL. So? The first time I usually do when coming to a class for proctoring, I will arrange the students’ seats. The seats at the first rows must be full first, then to the back.
Scoring the students’ test is one activity I don’t really like though. LOL. This is especially if the test is not just crossing/blackening the letters a, b, c, d that means a multiply choice test. If it is an essay test, I often get trouble to score if the students’ handwriting is difficult to read.  Unfortunately two subjects I have in one private college in Semarang cannot make me give the students multiple choice test.
Two weeks ago I gave my classes mid-term test. For the Poetry Analysis Class, I prepared four questions; while for the Drama Analysis Class, I prepared five questions. Since the name of the subject is related to ANALYSIS, of course I have to ask my students to analyze something that will make the students elaborate their answers. Luckily, different from last year I had two big classes, one class consisted of around 50 students, this year, I only have 15 students. I don’t need much time to score their answer sheets. I don’t need to get headache for a long time either when reading the ugly handwriting. LOL.
At this article, especially I want to focus on the Poetry Analysis Class. I inserted two poems to be analyzed by the students: “Stopping by the Woods on a Snowy Evening” by Robert Frost, and “Reassurance” by Charlotte Perkins Gilman. One thing I really enjoy from teaching literature subjects is I can give literary works written by feminists or that can be viewed using feministic perspective. By doing this, I can spread equality ideas between men and women to my students.
For the poem “Reassurance” itself, I gave it to be discussed in the class at the beginning of this semester where only four or five students arrived. I chose this poem to be inserted in the test rather than any other poems (such as “Sadie and Maud” by Gwendolyn Brooks, or “Ain’t I a Woman” by Sojourner Truth, or “Woman of My Color” by Wanda Coleman) in order to show my appreciation to the students who came to my class at that time. By attending my class, they would get involved in the discussion in the class so that they hopefully would get a better and clearer comprehension than the others who did not come at that time.
However, when scoring the answer of the students this morning, I did not find satisfying answer from the five particular students.  Only two of them wrote a satisfying analysis. Meanwhile, some other students who did not attend the class at that time could write a good interpretation.
As far as my teaching experience in English Department, I have found more students who do not enjoy studying literature than those who join the classes and involve themselves in the discussion enthusiastically. They come to English Department only to learn about ENGLISH, the language, and not any other subject.  In fact, if they only want to learn English, it is enough for them to go to English courses, and not to English Department. But of course they will not get any title from the English Course. And I know many people go to English Department only to get the certificate and the title, and not the knowledge that they will get.
Pathetic, eh? This is Indonesia, the dreaming country, my Abang said. LOL. Dreaming to be the leader of the world, eh? LOL.
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“Do you realize how relieving it is to have a scapegoat in our life?”

I found the interesting article with the similar title with the title of the post at www.superkoran.info This is not because I want to promote this online newspaper in my blogs, (after the owner posted my two articles there) NO, LOL, but because when reading the article there, I suddenly remember my own recent habit of using the two languages in my writing. LOL. I was about to leave a comment in that article, but due to my internet illiterate, I was confused how to leave a comment there. LOL.

(You know what? Even my Abang who is an expert in computer and internet didn’t know how to leave a comment in my blogs some months ago. LOL. He didn’t know either how to leave a comment in the shoutbox. Hahahaha … So, can we say that he is not fully computer and internet literate expert? Wakakakaka …)

Well, in fact he is also the SCAPEGOAT that has made me use the mixture of Bahasa and English in one writing. Aha … LOL. I am so excited thinking of writing this short article, you know. Hahahaha …

Before he ‘came’ into my life, I was somewhat strict in using what language to use in writing one email/article. Even, when writing emails to my good friends who speak both languages well, I usually want to focus only on one language—mostly English. In writing my articles for blogs, of course I choose to use English, since my first love for blogging is to my blog at http://afemaleguest.blog.co.uk where most visitors speak English.

The first time I started sending personal emails to my Abang of course I wrote them in English. However, he often replied in both languages, Bahasa and English. Some friends in the mailing lists I join who live abroad said that they were tired to speak English all the time so that they choose to interact in the mailing lists using English. This happens too to my Abang.

Gradually I was infected by him. LOL. I started mixing the use of the two languages. One day when I accused him for infecting that ‘contagious disease’ to me, simply he said, “Habis enak sih!!” (“It is yummy!!”) wakakakaka …

Since then on, I recognized that I started to write my articles for blogs in Bahasa, not only in English. Nah lo!!! LOL. However, after I decided to be more serious in blogging and registered my blog at http://afeministblog.blogspot.com at google adsense, I started to write more in English again.

But to write emails to my Abang, of course I still use both languages.

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My article entitled “Abortion” has been discussed quite extensively in some mailing lists I join. I posted this article in my blogs/mailing lists some weeks ago. I got two impressive comments too in my http://afemaleguest.blog.co.uk

However, when browsing some files I keep in the desktop where I save my articles for blogs, last night I found another article with the same title too. Only at that time, I didn’t clearly express my pro idea for this topic, and I didn’t ‘promote’ it in the mailing lists either.

My Abang that I suspect as one regular reader of my blogs—not to call him the most diligent one LOL—didn’t give comments on this directly. He even responded on a comment about (radical) feminists who would choose to live without men. Perhaps I can conclude that my Abang doesn’t want to get involved with my writing, that I have to be responsible with what I have written and posted in the blogs and mailing lists. J

One very interesting comment I got was asking about my saying, “women have full rights on their bodies so that they have full rights too to choose what they will do with their bodies.” (This is based on one motto of feminism about PERSONAL IS POLITICAL.) With “backup” of some other feminists in the mailing list, the discussion ended nicely. The man completely didn’t with the idea of “my body is mine”, especially for married couple.

However, when one topic related to ‘abortion’ finished, another person opened a new discussion. This time he mentioned about the right to live for the fetus. He inserted some quotes from Mother Teresa about abortion. The main idea is that the late Mother Teresa scolded ‘abortion’ as the same as killing babies.

I responded that practicing abortion is absolutely different from killing babies. Which is crueler, to terminate the fetus to grow, or to kill the baby after the baby was delivered because the mother doesn’t want the baby? I refer to what Alquran has said that a fetus that is less than three months old does not have soul yet because God doesn’t give it life yet. To end the response, I encourage to start establishing an organization to take care of girls who get pregnant without their want, and to adopt the babies, and then give the babies to those who want them.

I am of opinion that that person got annoyed with my response. (perhaps he got a bad day in his office so that it spurred him to write such a response with upset tone to me?)

He said that he and I would not be able to find a good compromise because it would lead the similar discussion of polygamy, pro or con. Hohoho NOT AT ALL. I still stick to say that polygamy can be HARAM by making a thorough interpretation of the whole verses in Alquran wholly, and not partially. I don’t want to rewrite it here. Just check my blogs. Use the search engine (for the visitors of http://afeministblog.blogspot.com) or click the tag of ‘polygamy’ for the visitors of my http://afemaleguest.blog.co.uk to find my posts on polygamy.)

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Semalam waktu ngecek mailbox (Senin 21 Mei 2007), aku mendapati email permohonan ijin pemuatan tulisanku di www.superkoran.info. Thinking (hopefully) that more people will read my two articles, "Going Beyond Pluralims" and "Absolute Truth" bakal dibaca lebih banyak orang, tentu saja aku mengizinkan moderator milis APAKABAR untuk memuatnya.
Siang ini aku ngecek mailbox lagi (Selasa 22 Mei 2007), aku telah mendapatkan balasan dari moderator milis APAKABAR yang memberitahuku bahwa kedua tulisanku itu telah dimuat di www.superkoran.info. Aduh, senengnya!!!
Kalau kamu mau menengoknya kesana, aku bakal senang sekali. Klik aja di

www.superkoran.info

dan … VOILA … you will find my articles there. di halaman tengah lagi, di paling atas lagi. WOW!!! WOW!!!

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In the first chapter of his book, Hendar Riyadi illustrated three stories illustrating the beauty of living in a plural community. I mean the people illustrated have different kinds of religion. The first example is the story of Ahmad Wahib, a Muslim that was born in Sampang Madura. He spent his childhood with two Catholic priests. The two priests took care of him very well during his childhood. When meeting the two priests again in his adulthood, he asked himself whether he had to be hostile to both of the Catholic priests only because they had different religions from him; whether God had a heart to put the two good people in jail, only because they were not Muslim.

The second story is about Farid Esack, a Muslim who was born in Bonteheuwel, Café Flats,

South Africa

, in a very poor family. He owed a lot to his Jewish and Christian neighbors, especially when he was still very young. He wrote:

“The fact that my family’s sufferings became a shared burden with my Jewish and Christian neighbors made me suspect that the idea of an absolute truth of one religion is a logical one.”

The third story is about a woman who was born in a Muslim family. She converted to Christian when she was in junior high school because she studied in a Christian school. Her parents allowed her to do that under one condition that she would be a good Christian. The freedom to choose what religion to adhere from her parents made her give freedom to her children to choose which religion to adhere.

The third story reminded me of one neighbor of mine. The husband and wife who are Muslim have six children. Both of them (un)luckily are type of people who do not the teachings of Islam very well. Hoping to give the children the best education, they sent the children to Catholic elementary school. They thought that there was no good state or Islamic school around the neighborhood at that time. Five children continued to Catholic junior high school. Since then on they converted to Catholic. The same as Wiwik’s parents, they just asked the children to be good Catholic. The fourth child, however, stayed Muslim because she continued her study to state junior and senior high school. From a distance I saw this family were quite happy family. Apparently they didn’t have any significant friction due to the different religion.

Until one day the mother learned to recite Alquran from a neighbor. It was the time when most of the children already grew up, and the mother had much spare time so that she could come to her neighbor’s house to learn to recite Alquran, and also to learn some other Islamic teachings. The neighbor that got strong indoctrination about absolute truth in Islam told the mother of six children that she had (mis)led her children to hellish path. “Only Muslims will be welcome in heaven later. You are very responsible for your children’s well being later on because you already misled them.”

The mother felt very unhappy and guilty and sinful. But what could she do? Her six children all have grown up. Will they listen to her if she asks her to convert to Islam?

As far as I know, her youngest child eventually converted to Islam, I don’t know what triggered him to do that. Was it because of the mother’s plea? Or anything else?

When reading the chapter one of Hendar Riyadi’s book, I also remember an old friend of Angie’s dad. When we were all in our twenties, he was a secular person, praying and fasting during Ramadhan month if he wanted, consuming alcohol anytime he wanted. After some years I didn’t keep in touch with him, one day, around 10 years ago, he came into my house, telling Angie’s dad that he already got ‘enlightenment’ from God. He joined some missions to spread Islam to some remote areas. His ‘enlightenment’, however, out of the blue made him a very annoying patriarchal man. He pissed me off only because I don’t wear Muslim clothes. He never looked into my face when talking to me coz perhaps in his eyes I became like a temptress Eve who beguiled Adam. When I went to his house four years ago to have Angie’s school uniform made (apart from his missions to spread Islam, he is a tailor.) When I arrived to his house, quickly he said, without looking into my face, “Go the back of the house. A woman is not supposed to sit together with man in the living room.”

An enlightenment, huh?

Reading the book also reminded me of one ex workmate, a Christian who married a Muslim man. She told me when she visited her in-laws living out of town, she often felt oppressed because her in-laws asked her to pray five times a day, to fast during Ramadhan month, and they also encouraged her to wear Muslim clothes. As far as I know, when living in

Semarang

, she still goes to church that means she is still a Christian. I conclude that she still goes on with her religion, while her Muslim husband still keeps his Islam. She used to complain to me, “I am wondering why my Muslim in-laws are so arrogant, thinking that Islam is the only absolute truth. I am a Christian, I don’t consider this religion as an absolute truth. I respect my in-laws. Am I too much if I expect my in-laws to respect me too? I still keep my being Christian now because this has been my religion since I was born. I have no idea to convert to Islam yet. Even if that happens, I want it to happen naturally, without any oppression. I will let my daughter choose which religion she feels comfortable with.”

She and I dream to have a conducive atmosphere where people respect one another’s religion. So people will live peacefully.

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